(By Wendy at Catto Homecare)
The question we are most asked, is how to broach the subject of a parent or loved one needing care. This is obviously going to be different for everyone depending on their own experiences of parents and grandparents who needed additional help. For some older adults, they reach a crisis point eg a fall or a urine infection where the hospital will only discharge with a care package in place. However, what do you do when nothing significant has happened? Where do you even begin? Have you been struggling for a long time with supporting your loved one and you are coming close to no longer being able to sustain the increase in their needs? Maybe you are physically not in the greatest of health yourself? I often use this example to compare with an elastic band. Some people can stretch to an extraordinary level but we can only flex the band to a certain level until it snaps.
At Catto Homecare we find the most successful method is to adapt your approach eg ‘it’s more for me me, so that I don’t worry during the day / evening’ or ‘you are fine but I am constantly worried about you’. Most people associate the word ‘care’ as wiping bottoms so mentioning ‘support’ rather than care will be more favourably received. If this angle is still not successful, you may find a more honest approach could work. The person may not be aware that your life could be on hold as you undertake an increasing amount of day to day tasks for them eg carrying out the shopping, all laundry, making their bed, ironing, giving support with personal care, liaising with the pharmacies, GP practice, doing gardening and missing out with family events etc. It is recommended that you admit you are not able to cope, and need support. A good starting point is to hire a cleaner to come every fortnight.
Almost all our clients past and present had no idea we were able to take them for eg bra fittings or to go to a café to enjoy a once a week coffee and cake. We introduce this as modern care. Loneliness and lack of stimulation during the day has become an increasingly problematic issue as activity centres / day centres / organisations are no longer offering what they did pre lockdown.’
Wendy
Registered Manager,
Catto Homecare
Registered Address: 5 Hamesmoor Way, Mytchett GU16 6JG, UK
Opening Hours: Mondays to Thursdays 8am – 4:30pm, Fridays 8am – 4pmTel: 01276 500 522
Email: wendy@catto.net